How to STOP Overthinking: Tips, Techniques and Strategies
As a counsellor and coach, I often hear clients asking me how to stop overthinking. Clients describe overthinking as a constant barrage of negative thoughts racing through their minds, the sound of continuous chatter, or playing out past and future scenarios, all with different endings. This blog will provide tips, techniques, and strategies to help you stop overthinking in its tracks, providing you with the calmness your body and mind need.
Constant intrusive thoughts can make people anxious and stressed, impacting how they feel during the day. They can also cause sleepless nights, which can take its toll on a person’s mental health. Overthinking can feel like a relentless cycle of destructive thought patterns and catastrophic predictions that refuse to switch off or quiet down. If you experience this level of overthinking, you know how exhausting it can be.
I often liken overthinking to going on an emotional roller-coaster; you repeatedly experience the emotions attached to events that your mind creates. You have been on this emotional journey but haven’t been anywhere apart from trapped in an endless cycle of anxious thoughts.
Let’s examine the triggers, mental and physical symptoms, and tips and strategies for conquering negative thinking patterns.
What Triggers Overthinking?
Understanding what triggers overthinking can be revealing. This insight can help you achieve a more calming and peaceful mind and lead you to personal growth.
Notice how overthinking tends to start for you. It is triggered by;
- An event or situation that you find stressful
- A sudden recollection of past events that has made you feel embarrassed or not good enough? An assumption based on how you perceive the actions of others
- The fear of confrontation or upsetting another person
For example, it could be a sideways glance from a friend, the tone of a work email, or an unanswered WhatsApp message. Thoughts can quickly escalate and result in running different conversations through your mind, with different endings; usually, these thoughts have worst-case scenario outcomes.
When you notice the triggers, the next time you end up overthinking, you can remind yourself that it is just a thought, not a fact. You can then decide what you would like to do with the idea. Is there some problem-solving to do? How does the thought make you feel? Can you describe the feeling and name it? Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is a therapy that can help with reframing thoughts. The premise of CBT is that thoughts, feelings, and behaviours are all interlinked. The NHS offer self-help CBT, or a CBT therapist can provide support.
The Downside of Overthinking
Overthinking, catastrophising, and trapping yourself in negative thought patterns prevent you from living in the present moment. Getting into the vicious cycle of overthinking can impact your daily life. Research demonstrates overthinking can be responsible for issues which include:
- Mental Health Conditions
- Isolation
- Sleep Issues
- Procrastination
- Low confidence and low self-esteem
- Headaches, muscle tension and digestive problems
This physical and mental toll is a stark reminder of the need to address overthinking. However, the million-dollar question is, what is the best way to free yourself from overthinking?
Breaking Free from Overthinking
Breaking free from overthinking isn’t just about pushing away your thoughts. It’s about taking control, changing your relationship with these persistent thoughts, and finding alternative ways to manage them.
An excellent place to start is to recognise how overthinking affects you. Notice the mental and physical symptoms and reflect on how they impact other areas of your life, such as interacting with others, progressing in the workplace, or procrastinating. Then, flip this on its side: If you didn’t overthink, what would life look like then? This part is essential as it serves as the driver for you to beat overthinking.
Reflecting on your thoughts may seem counterproductive, as it involves more thinking! However, stay with me. Overthinking can sometimes be helpful, but you must find better ways to manage your overthinking habits, which we will discuss later in this blog.
Reviewing the past and planning the future can be helpful. However, it is essential to enjoy the here and now rather than getting caught up in a spiral of “what ifs”, “could haves “, and “should haves.”
Overthinking and The Red Car Theory?
The red car theory suggests you will see it everywhere once you focus on something. For example, if you think of a red car, suddenly, there will be many red cars on the road. The truth is that there are no more red cars on the road than before, but it only seems that way because you are looking for red cars; this is at the forefront of your mind. The presence of other cars becomes insignificant and almost unnoticeable as your attention is on red cars.
The red car theory results from attention and perception rather than an increase in the stimuli in question. If you find yourself in the trap of overthinking, try to remember this theory, as it can bring you some relief from your thoughts.
Case Study: How the Red Car Theory Fits with Overthinking
Emma’s colleague Tom comes into work one day and is unusually quiet. Emma notices Tom doesn’t smile when he sits down and doesn’t speak for most of the morning.
Emma started thinking about what she could have done or said to upset him. Was it the last email she sent? Did it sound curt rather than friendly? Emma revisited past situations in her mind, such as the time she forgot to hand over an important document and the time she missed a necessary appointment.
Emma concludes that she has made Tom angry, which must be related to her incompetence. She remembers other times when Tom was quiet and believes he doesn’t like working with her.
With these thoughts going through her mind, Emma struggles to focus on her work. She becomes aware of other colleagues around her interacting with each other, making her feel more alone and unpopular. These thoughts confirm to Emma that Tom doesn’t like her, that she is unpopular in the office, and that she HAS evidence of this.
Confirmation Bias
However, the reality of this situation is likely to be quite different. There could be several reasons why Tom was quiet; he may have had bad news before coming into the office, missed the earlier train he intended to catch, or had a difficult night’s sleep. Similarly, Emma’s colleagues often chat and interact with each other; this isn’t unusual as they sit next to each other and must interact within their roles.
This example demonstrates confirmation bias, which occurs when you seek information to support your thoughts and disregard any other information that does not fit the story you are telling yourself. Confirmation bias can impact decision-making and your perception of situations and events.
Practical Steps to Overcome Overthinking
Overcoming the relentless noise of overthinking involves a multifaceted approach. As a Pluralistic Counsellor, there is no one-size-fits-all approach; it’s more about trying different techniques until you discover what works best for you.
Below is a range of self-care techniques known to help with overthinking. Trying different techniques can take time, but investing time in yourself is the first positive step.
Breathing Exercises:
Deep breathing exercises are a great way to stop overthinking. You can try many different breathing exercises, including the Square Breathing Technique, which will help slow down your heart rate, make you feel more relaxed, and give you mental clarity.
Keeping a Gratitude Journal:
Every day, spend a few minutes writing down what you are grateful for, or if you do it in the evening, write about what you have been thankful for during the day. It can be something that would typically go unnoticed, such as the beauty of nature around you, the brief interaction you had on your morning commute, or ticking jobs off your ‘to-do’ list.
Body Scan Meditation:
Get comfortable and focus your attention on different parts of your body. Begin with your toes and move upwards, noticing any areas of tension or discomfort. This exercise brings an awareness of the present moment and highlights how overthinking can impact physical health.
Mindfulness Meditation Practices:
Pick up a small object and hold it in your hand. Set a timer for five minutes and adequately focus on this object. How does it feel? Move your hand over the different textures, take in every detail, how it smells, and look at the colours. If thoughts come into your mind, just let them go and bring yourself back to looking at the object as soon as you notice them.
Physical Activity:
When you exercise, your body releases many hormones that make you feel good, such as endorphins, serotonin, and dopamine. Exercise can be anything from a brisk walk to gentle exercise, team sports, or a gym workout. Choose whatever works best for you.
Allocate Time to Reflect:
It can help to observe a thought mindfully rather than pushing it away. Accept the thought without judgment; write it down or do some problem-solving. A good tip is to allocate a time limit to reflect on thoughts during the day; often, when you reflect on them at a different time, they may feel insignificant, and you can let them go.
RTT Hypnosis Audios:
As a qualified RTT therapist, I have created a stop-overthinking hypnosis audio explicitly designed to help you break free from the cycle of overthinking. My recordings use guided imagery and deep relaxation techniques to access your subconscious mind, allowing you to let go of persistent, negative thoughts and replace them with calm and constructive thoughts.
These techniques will help you stay in the present and offer you peace and tranquillity while your focus is only on what you are doing. The good news is that you will feel empowered by taking control of your mind, knowing you prioritise your mental health and overall well-being.
When Overthinking Can Be Helpful
When we hear the word overthinking, it often comes with negative connotations. If you consider yourself overthinking, you might have heard responses like these from friends, family or colleagues.
- It’s not that complicated. What’s your gut telling you?
- You are spending far too much time thinking about this.
- Are you still thinking about this? Why don’t you make a decision?
- I can hear this situation is stressing you; you are overthinking it.
Overthinking can often come from worrying about making the wrong decision. However, there is usually no definite right or wrong decision. We need to decide based on the information we have available. This is where problem-solving can be a powerful tool, as it can help identify which actionable steps you can take to get the best outcome.
(GuhaRoy, 2024) has written an interesting article about how overthinking can be helpful. It can be the case that overthinking is useful when carrying out academic research, problem-solving or making important life decisions. Set aside time to mindfully spend time with the thoughts that repeatedly come up for you during the day. Allocate time to sit with these thoughts; some may not require any more thought. Or, you may have to do some problem-solving around specific thoughts; if this is the case, allocate time and take a more structured approach to what you feel you need to do with the thought.
To Conclude
You don’t have to live a life filled with constant worry if you are an overthinker. You can use many tips, strategies, and tools to overcome this. Additionally, exploring and getting to the root cause of this constant worrying can be helpful. For example, if you don’t trust your decisions or feel that you aren’t good enough, this could be linked to issues around self-esteem or low confidence. Working on your decision-making skills will increase your self-esteem and confidence as you can trust your own decisions, which will help prevent you from getting on the wheel of overthinking.
These strategies can work great on their own or with the support of a trusted friend, but if you would like some extra guidance and support, professional help may be beneficial. If you would like to discuss further how I can help you with overthinking, please don’t hesitate to contact me.
